Happy Daze: Purple Week Reflection

For those of you who attended Take Back the Night, you heard the domestic violence stories firsthand from survivors. And they are just that: survivors. To those who could not make it, the rhetoric surrounding these accounts truly showed the amount of hurt that people on this campus carry. In solidarity with St. Lawrence University’s Advocates for Purple Week, a week dedicated to Domestic Violence Awareness, this week’s piece is on how we can start to heal because we deserve to heal and feel comfort. Comfort in one’s own body can mean everything to a survivor. How do we start this process?   

Adrienne Maree Brown, author of “Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good” (2019), provides us with a refreshing and well-grounded method for healing: pleasure. It is important to note that pleasure doesn’t only exist within the sexual realm but through a much larger sense of our interests, desires and what we enjoy. Pleasure, in this sense, can be thought of as self-care, but it is more than that. It makes life worth living. It elicits feel-good endorphins and evokes a sense of euphoria in us. When you are experiencing pleasure, you are promoting your own healing and, ultimately, your well-being as you are valuing and honoring yourself and your needs.   

At the end of the day, everyone needs pleasure in their life. It is human nature to seek pleasure, and no, it’s not a bad thing. We must dispel the rumor that pleasure is temptation, and we must feel ‘guilty’ about it. Let us embrace our pleasure as long as it is not hurting others or infringing upon their rights. Brown’s approach to embracing pleasure as a holistic concept can help one move toward a more fulfilling and balanced life, whatever that looks like. We all experience pleasure differently. What is pleasurable to me may not be pleasurable to you, and vice versa. This can be due to societal, cultural, or individual reasons, and that’s okay! I am not here to yuck your yum, I’m here to promote more pleasure in your life and inform you of its benefits and/or potential.   

Brown outlines eight pleasure principles that promote pleasure and support people on their journey. 1. What you pay attention to grows; Tune into happiness, what satisfies you, what brings you joy. 2. We become what we practice; be the embodiment of what we want. 3. Yes is the way; lean into the things that give you pleasure. 4. Know that when you are happy, it is good for the world. 5. The deepest pleasure comes from riding the line between commitment and detachment; commit yourself fully to the journey and detach yourself from ego and outcomes. 6. Make justice and liberation feel good; use pleasure as a way to achieve equality and justice. Brown makes the argument that if a journey towards creating a more just and equitable society is personally rewarding and enjoyable, more people are likely to actively engage in these efforts and stay committed to the cause. 7. Your no makes the way for your yes; boundaries create the space for an authentic yes. Being able to say no makes yes a choice; this empowers individuals. 8. Moderation is key; Brown writes, “The idea is not to be in a state of ecstasy at all times, but rather to learn how to sense when something is good for you, to be able to feel what enough is.”  These principles can ultimately transform how we view pleasure and how we go through life.   

I encourage you all to think about pleasure in your life and your relation to it. Pleasure isn’t something that you should feel guilty about, nor should it be something you neglect to feel and experience. Brown also warns that pleasure should not exist in excess as “excess totally destroys the spiritual experience of pleasure.” Pleasure is a means of empowering your body and mind to transform how you experience and navigate life. By making justice and liberation feel good, we can create a more inclusive and committed community that not only advocates for change but derives joy and satisfaction from the journey towards a just and equitable society. Pleasure, in all its forms, is a powerful and transformative force that should be celebrated and nurtured as part of the human experience. Pleasure infuses life with meaning and vitality, and we should embrace it responsibly.