The term slut is usually negatively connoted, and even more commonly it is assumed female. A slut usually describes a woman that sleeps around with a lot of people. In times of pure monogamy, when there was really only one (sexual) partner for life, this term must have been deeply derogatory.
Clearly, the idea of devaluing a woman based on her sexual encounters is no longer an acceptable way of thinking about women, their bodies and their consent. Many of us have multiple sexual partners throughout our lifetime, even though most still follow a pattern of serial monogamy: one partner at a time.
I, however, think it is time that the slut gets a makeover.
Because there is nothing wrong with being a slut, there is nothing wrong with sleeping with multiple people. The idea that our worth and our bodies is connected to how many people we had sex with is in no way sex-positive.
How many people touched your body, or how many you allowed to be intimate with you, does not determine your worth, and it especially does not determine your morals or your ability to give consent.
So once and for all: you can be a good person and sleep with however many people you want. Being a slut, then, should not be a big deal. If you want to be a slut go for it, embrace it and let nobody tell you that your worth is determined by the number of your sexual partners.
Be a slut if you want to. But be an ethical one. What that means is that every good slut still needs to follow the rules of intimacy–the number one rule being consent.
Any form of intimacy requires consent. Consent can only exist if you give your partner, no matter if only for a night or long-term, full disclosure, so that they can make an informed decision.
This is especially important for people that are polyamorous, or have decided that they want to practice consensual non-monogamy. Polyamory works in so many ways–from being in an open relationship with a primary partner to being happily single and seeing multiple people casually.
But there is one thing that all of those scenarios must have in common: there has to be consent.
Consent means that all parties agree to whatever action is taking place at that moment, and they can only do so if they have the information required to make an informed decision over whether they agree and enjoy what is happening.
A very good article that attempts to tear down the taboo state of women having sex. Both genders need sex- just look at Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Obviously I am all for consent between two partners. That said, how do we address a partner denying that they ever gave consent when they may/may have not done so in bedroom? I say this assuming 3rd party witnesses and physical evidence is limited. It’s not like there are security cameras inside all college dormrooms to record whether consent was given (for obvious reasons), and falsely accusing one of rape is just as evil rape itself. Both acts destroy lives.