The Importance of Greek Life
I’ve made a lot of good decisions in my life, but probably just as many that I regret. As I head into the latter half of my last semester of college, probably ever, I can’t help but reflect on the things I regret doing, and the things I’m thankful I did do. One thing that really surprises me is that joining the Beta Chapter here on campus is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.
Having just written that sentence I cringed a little, if younger me heard that he would be repulsed. I grew up hearing about fraternities like most of you probably did. In the news, there was egregious hazing incidents and enabling all sorts of toxic abuse; from first hand accounts it was always drugs, parties, and women. None of this appealed to me, and it still doesn’t. When I came to St. Lawrence University my first year, I was disgusted at the idea of fraternities.
I was, however, hot on duck hunting and Ducks Unlimited. My freshman year was the COVID-19 year, and one of the few social things we could do was recreate outdoors. By meeting friends of friends of friends, I found myself hunting and spending time with a few guys in Beta. Despite my best attempts to ignore it, it became clear to me very quickly that I was a lot like them, and I was more similar to the Beta guys I knew than most anybody else on campus. I was slowly convinced that Beta wasn’t the type of institution I thought it was. So in the fall of sophomore year, I rushed Beta, while most of my freshman year friends rushed ATO.
My friends and I compared experiences and realized the same thing. Beta and ATO were not at all what we thought it was going to be. We expected a bunch of wealthy, pompous, “bro’s” or guys straight out of “Neighbors” and “Nelk Boys” videos. Instead we were met with a bunch of normal guys our age, with similar interest, all bought into an institution that told them they matter. In the era of male epidemic loneliness, where we see more young men lost and depressed than ever before, fraternities offered each of us the opportunity to be a part of a group that made us feel like we belonged and we mattered. When you get right down to it, that is why I would say joining Beta is one of the best decisions I ever made at SLU. Beta made me feel like I belonged and I mattered to this campus.
People seem to always want to know what my favorite part of Beta is. I love living in the house, which I’m sure shocks some. I’ll admit it can get dirty (although no dirtier than I saw Dean Eaton get my sophomore year) and the amenities are a little outdated, but living with ~50 of your best friends is even more enjoyable than it sounds. There’s always stuff going on, from Fortnite in Wes Bevin’s ’24 room, homework in the study room, music from Artie’s ’24 room and so on. I can walk into any open door at 25 college St. and feel welcome, how many other dorms can say that? The toughest part is sometimes finding a way to focus in the house with all my friends around, but everybody figures out a system. Living in Beta is the best part of the experience.
Another thing that I love is always having buddies who are interested in doing stuff together. Sometimes I walk around the house to all the open doors and stir people to go to dana. Someone is always in the groupchat asking to grab meal exchange with others. There’s 60 of us. Odds are pretty good that if I want to go skiing or ice fishing others will be coming along. I’m of the opinion that this sort of culture enables people to step outside their comfort zone, because somebody is always up to try something new with me. My sophomore year a bunch of the guys in the house got into spin classes at the gym, this year we had everybody doing cold plunges. We have a strong culture of doing things together.
I’ve heard people argue that fraternities become echo chambers. I’ve found the exact opposite. I hangout with 60 young men with 60 unique backgrounds, each with unique philosophies and beliefs. We have members from Hawaii to Northern Europe and almost everywhere in between. I wish people could hear the heated and fascinating conversations that happen between members who are incredibly different and bring very different ideals to the table. I am exposed to far more diversity of thought and background in Beta than if I had stayed friends with just the same few people from my first year on. I personally dislike calling the people in Beta with me “brothers” and I can’t think of anyone who does so informally or unironically, because it can be so cringe worthy. However, even though we don’t use that word, it’s hard to avoid the reality that there is a sort of fraternal bond. I get along with some guys in the fraternity more than others, and we as a group certainly aren’t perfect. However, I have complete confidence that I will be called out for my mistakes, and loved in spite of them. When I need something, I know that somebody always has my back. That is an incredible feeling, to be held accountable yet still accepted for who you are.
I cannot speak to what happens in ATO, but from the couple of buddies I have across the street, it seems they function in a very similar way, and the crew over there feels just as at home as we do. As aforementioned, I’m half a semester away from graduating, so here’s the part where I give advice to the young men on this campus. Go Greek if it suits you. Make a conscious effort to meet the guys at both houses, see which group you feel is a good fit. That’s not to say fraternities are for everyone, but don’t assume they’re not for you based on some preconceived notion that is incredibly wrong, like I did. I live with my best friends, and college is the one shot we get to do that. Don’t pass the opportunity to genuinely fit in and feel at home because of assumptions, please. We’re an imperfect group that is looking to add you and your imperfection, so long as you’re willing to be a little better everyday.
In a modern world where a ton of metrics of male success are wavering, from lower college enrollment rates to suicide and depression rates, young men are in crisis. Fraternities at SLU offer one solution to a massively complex problem, and I’m of the strong opinion that gives them value. I leave Beta a better person than I joined, genuinely. That’s my argument for fraternities at SLU. We can tout dollars raised for charity or hours of community service, but that’s all useless without the broader context. I belong to a brotherhood that holds me accountable and loves me, and joining it was one of the best damn decisions I’ve ever made.