Since the beginning of quarantine, people all over the world have been longing for companionship more than ever. FaceTime and phone calls may help, but the physical presence of other humans allows us to feel a sense of ease. It reassures us that we’re a part of something greater than ourselves. Loneliness is a natural, human feeling that can actually have detrimental effects on our health. Especially when loneliness is chronic, mental health disorders such as anxiety, depression, and post traumatic stress disorder can result.
But why do we actually long for this social connection? As with many human desires, it’s linked to the way we’ve evolved as mammals. According to Elena Blanco-Suarez, a brain chemist writing for Psychology Today, evolutionarily it was advantageous to be surrounded by people for protection and groupwork. Our brain still believes this is important, driving our desire for company. The release of serotonin and dopamine, neurotransmitters important for stabilizing our mood and creating happiness, are disrupted in the presence of loneliness, giving way to the detrimental effects.
One way of overcoming this feeling of being isolated is to reach out and engage in conversation. It’s easy to sit in the house all day and not pay attention to the outside world during quarantine. Because we aren’t leaving the house, we don’t have to make a conscientious decision to be social. However, it is very important that an effort is actually made to make social connections. Putting yourself out there isn’t always easy, but providing yourself a way in which social interaction can bloom (like joining a new online club) will begin to alleviate the symptoms of chronic loneliness.
According Heidi Halvorson, another writer for Psychology Today, one of the most important tips for helping the loneliness we feel is changing our mindset. According to Halvorson, research has shown that chronic loneliness increases our awareness in rejection and hostility. While it is reasonable to acknowledge the negative aspects of our lives, it is important to focus on the positives. “Changing maladaptive thinking” has proven to be one of the most effective methods for easing loneliness symptoms. The key to achieving this technique is identifying and understanding your feelings, followed by analyzing and challenging the validity of these feelings. Then, the maladaptive thoughts should be replaced with more practical feelings, which will ultimately provide a positive outlook and increased confidence.
With increasing loneliness across the world due to the pandemic, it is important to be aware of your feelings and take care of your mental health. Practicing techniques such as actively engaging in social interaction, finding new ways to meet and connect with people, and changing maladaptive thinking can help alleviate the stress that loneliness puts on us and provide us with the sense of belonging that humans so strongly desire.