“CARE FOR ME” by Saba: Grief, Hope and Everything in Between
Rap can be the connective tissue between hearts and minds.
On the 5th of April, I was excited to hear that Saba released his second album: “CARE FOR ME.” Little did I know that the 10 track album would profoundly connect with my lived experience and bring some perspective.
In fact, we share many things in common: Our age (22-23), hairstyle (unkept and wild), skipping 2 grades in elementary school, an interest in beatmaking and shared experience of blackness.
The difference is that he followed his heart to make music and I compromised for the more secure route: a college education then employment.
On this album, he returned to a headspace haunted by grief, depression, heartbreak, and most importantly hope.
His album begins with “BUSY/ SIRENS”, a self-reflective song provoked by the recent murder of his close friend John Walt in 2017. The song is split into two parts but maintains a raw and revealing tone. With his first song, Saba re-emerges with retrospection and explores the broken parts of his lived experience.
The title of the album becomes appreciable in “BROKEN GIRLS”. He chooses to reflect on his love interests. Throughout the song, he raps about his yearning to be cared for by others, especially broken girls who seem to reciprocate his emotional state but later on use it to their advantage. The first four lines of verse one illustrate this:
“Really I’m broke myself, and I think she might help/Really I love a story, and I think she might tell/Really I’m not your crutch, really you not my girl./Really she usin’ me, but it’s cool, we use eachoth ”
Each song seems to end without closure, as if more time could have been assigned to the topic at hand. However, Saba chooses to move on to the next issue in his life maintaining the momentum of his album.
“LIFE” is an anomaly in this album. It brings about an intense and agitated tone. Like many songs in hip hop, this song explores the anxiety that some Black people experience in the United States.
From Saba’s point of view, being black in America is like having “angels runnin’ ‘way” and “demons huntin’ me [you]”
Once again, Saba abandons an important topic in the interest of time and continues his self-reflective journey.
“CALLIGRAPHY” showcases the power of rap and poetry in uplifting wretched youth. Saba shares his tribulations then sings a chorus that describes the importances of calligraphy; the power to write away your problems. He forsakes this message to discuss fighting in “FIGHTER,” in this song he comes to the realization that he does not want to fight others or himself anymore. The song ends with a pirouette that I love, a sound that exudes the feeling of forfeit and accepting of one’s circumstances in order to change them.
From this dark space, Saba transports us to“SMILE,” a place better describes as: “Sweet west side Chicago, two-flat apartment/ Red brick and garden, that’s been forgotten/ Grass all splotchy, vacant lot splotchy, back account splotchy…” and his dreams to make million dollars and vacation in the south. Despite his unfortunate circumstances, he again returns to a place of happiness in the chorus with a reminder: “Smile, smile, smile, smile…”During my first listen, this was a much needed reprieve, without it, the melancholy would have been too much to bear.
From then on, Saba and Chance the Rapper collaborate to discuss the importance of logging out, something that Daria Alekseeva articulately perfectly in last weeks issue. “LOGOUT” discusses the effects of social media on its users. Both artists point out the insecurity of being forgotten when one logs out and the many negatives generated by social media when one logs in. In my opinion, Saba’s abandonment of this topic is the most heartbreaking, so much more could be said but he had many more ideas to express with little time to do so.
So I forgave him.
There are three more songs to discuss but like Saba I chose to abandon that mission and point out the significance of this album. Saba shies away from the pompous party songs that plague hip hop today. He is using rap to create deep connections that not only improve his mental health, but also the mind state of his listeners. In that way, Saba cares for you, it is up to you to care for him. Simply put, caring for Saba’s stories brings internal healing for those who chose to listen to him.
So this weekend take a break from bumping Drake’s “Nice for What” which also has the words “care for me” repeating from the sample of Lauren Hill’s Ex-Factor in it. Instead. take the time to care for Saba; his stories need ears; his experiences need to be realized. If you don’t you are complicit in the reduction and rejection of young black experiences.
Just kidding or am I?